Passion #1

Been thinking a lot about what it means to be in love.  Is some of it a choice, or is it something you can’t control at all?  Is overwhelming passion a requirement for a successful relationship?  Unfortunately, I have been in the grip of passion that I can’t control, and it seems I’ll never be able to capture that again.

She was a prior military medic, just starting on a Ph.D., into fitness and philosophy, and a whole lotta tattoos.  Seemed like a perfect match, and I was overcome.  We had two dates and things were great.  Apparently she didn’t have the same impression.  Within a week, my texts were being ignored and I was heartbroken.

For some reason, a different feeling came over me.  I wasn’t going to give up on this one without a fight.  She was an INFJ, and I felt maybe she was just skittish, if I kept things up she could be won over.  I kept sending a text every few days, with no reply.  She had mentioned a her MS graduation ceremony was in a few weeks, and her mom was going to fly in for it.  This became my new plan.  I looked up the ceremony, bought a suit and some flowers, took off work and drove the few hours to the ceremony not really knowing what to expect.

Once there, I was able to sneak into the ceremony building.  Eagerly I waited on my love and kept my eyes searching the crowds of people.  Then I finally saw her, and my heart jumped, she was with a guy!  My angel had just moved on.   I couldn’t believe it.  Maybe it wasn’t her, I texted her number, and saw her look down.  Well, that sealed it.  She looked around in a panic and saw me.  She quickly grabbed her guy and ran outside, supposedly to take some pictures.

I looked down at the flowers I had bought.  Fuck this.  She was getting these flowers, I was on a mission.  When she came back in, she tried to walk past me into the ceremony without an indication.  My heart raced, I shoved the flowers into her arms and said something like “you need these”.  As I walked past her out the building I could hear her guy say an incredulous “really?!”

Exhultant that I actually gave her the flowers, although bummed on the overall outcome, I texted her something like “that’s what you get for ignoring me, but seriously congrats on the graduation.” There was no reply.

If only it ended there 🙂 to be continued in part two:

https://starandlotus.wordpress.com/2016/08/17/passion-2/

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