Breaking up

Which is a harder, being broken up with or having to do the breakup?

Being broken up with, especially by someone you care about and liked, can really suck.  It’s heart wrenching to go through, and you’re just left with a big hole in your life.  There is an endless stream of self-questioning and doubt, as you wonder what you could have done differently and what was really the issue at hand.

However, being the one to do the break up is also hard, especially if you do care about the person.  I went through this, and felt I did as much or more crying during the actual breakup as the now ex.  It was relatively early in the relationship and I just wasn’t feeling it, and felt there would be a lot of issues going forward so figured it would be best to cut things off rather than prolong them.  But she was still a nice person and did assuage my loneliness, so I was going to miss her.  We talked for a while, I wanted to give her a chance to ask whatever she wanted or say whatever she had to.  Then we broke things off.

I would suspect now I’m doing a bit better than her, she was surprised and I was at least mentally prepared.  But damn it did suck going through it the day of.

-Dmitri

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